David Robertson's Story

David Robertson's Story

22 years ago, I suffered the first big loss in my life. My friend was killed by a car while walking home from a party. This sent me into a spiral which I have yet to come out of.

David Robertson's Story

I spent my late teens and most of my 20s drowning my sorrows in drink. I was a mess and struggled to take in what had happened and keep myself on the straight and narrow. I struggled with all aspects of life and made many bad life choices.

10 years on from that, I was Best Man at my friend’s wedding in June 2012. Later that year, in December, he took his own life. This came as a total shock. I’d had lunch with him 2 days before and everything seemed well in the world. Again, I lost control. I was off work for some time, trying to get my head around things. I felt alone in the world and didn’t know who to turn to or where to get the help I needed. I tried counselling but I could not get from that what I needed.

Fast forward another 10 years and my closest childhood friend and Best Man at my wedding died of an overdose. He was addicted to opioid based painkillers. This again knocked me for 6. I knew he had issues and was ill, but I did not expect this. Months went by and I wondered why I was continually affected by these tragedies. My wife, who is a fantastic support, pointed me in the direction of StrongMen. I got in touch in April 2023 and a month later, was on a Weekender in Snowdonia.

weekender

Attending the Weekender was a bit of a step outside my comfort zone. Travelling down to Wales from Scotland to meet with a group of people I had never met was not something which filled me with joy but I had to try something different. I was immediately made to feel welcome by all in the group. Hillwalking is my hobby so I felt relaxed and confident on the climb up Snowdon which allowed me to open up a bit and tell my backstory and why I was there. I listened to others and realised I’m not alone.

3 weeks after the weekender, my father-in-law was killed in another tragic accident, a house fire. This set me back in my recovery and I struggled again to comprehend what had happened. This time I had StrongMen to fall back on. Many calls, texts etc were exchanged and it gave me the support and encouragement to speak about how I was feeling.

I attended the StrongMen 5 Year Reunion earlier in July and it was great to meet old friends and make new ones. I cannot thank StrongMen enough for the support they have given me and what they do for men who are suffering with grief. My struggles haven’t gone away and may never go away but there is support out there. Reach out to Efrem and the rest of the StrongMen team if you are struggling with grief and loss. You won’t regret it. Visit it the website, see what they do and donate if you can. The stigma around men’s mental health is still present but StrongMen are helping to break down barriers. They are allowing men to express their feelings without being judged and long may that continue.

David Robertson