Hi my names Gary and I’m from Glasgow, I lost my beautiful wife Laura to secondary breast cancer in march 2023 after a 4 year battle and at that point I was at an all time low. Laura was always my strength with how she went about her journey.
She never once asked for sympathy and if you ever met her she would always be more interested in how you are than wanting someone to feel sorry for her which was a testament to her character. When Laura passed I was totally lost, I was worrying about everything in life. Our future was gone, our plans to have a family and make so many more memories.
I tried speaking with a grief councillor and also with Maggies support centre here in Glasgow, I was told I didn’t give it enough time but I knew right away after one appointment at each it just wasn’t for me. I constantly told myself I was just another number to these places and when I left they would just clock off, I doubted that anyone could help me and no matter what they said it just wouldn’t make me feel any better. Then in November 2023 someone asked me if I had heard of StrongMen and I should have a look into the charity. So I went on the website and registered my interest in a weekender. At this point I thought it’s fine I probably won’t hear back for a while, a few weeks passed and I was invited to a StrongMen weekender which i had no hesitation in accepting the invite.
When the week arrived to head to Wales for Snowden I doubted myself so many times, could I do this, was I ready to speak about my grief and would it just make me feel worse and open up those wounds more. But I’m so glad I made it there, there was no pressure to talk about your situation. Everyone made me feel like I wasn’t alone, just simply by being around the guys made me feel so comfortable. Nobody had to say anything, we just all got it.
Hiking up Snowden things changed, on the hike I just seemed to open up and talk. Things I felt like I was maybe taking to long to deal with at home and was I doing things wrong on my journey. It was comforting to know I wasn’t alone and that I was doing things right and at my own pace. I was sad that the weekend was over and I had to head back to daily life but once home I had a different outlook on life. Was I fixed? Not a chance but I was a lot more positive after being around the guys and opening up.
I couldn't recommended StrongMen enough, there was no pressure to speak about your grief but if you did everyone was so supportive. I’m proud to be part of the StrongMen community and I can’t wait to see everyone again.
